Spin to Win!

By: Arment Dietrich | September 17, 2007 |

It seems to be an appropriate time for Michigan football to cut its losses; that’s only because they can’t erase them. As a Michigan alum I still take great pride in “Hailing the Victor,” even if lately the actual victor hasn’t necessarily been my boys in blue.

Admittedly, it’s time for me to ignore the marching band’s sweet melodies from the victorious days of yesteryear and face the real music. In the two opening games of this season, the initially fifth-ranked Michigan Wolverines have lost to Appalachian state (a 1-AA team) and the lackluster Ducks from Oregon! How does such an obviously overrated team bounce back from losing two games that they absolutely should have won? What will this do to their recruiting efforts down the road? The best spinning efforts imaginable couldn’t even begin to justify Michigan’s poor performance this year; yet Coach Carr keeps coming up with more and more excuses.

Personally, I’m beyond sick of listening to Lloyd Carr try to spin his losses and manipulate trivial details to compensate for his complete lack of solid leadership. I guess what they say is true… You really can’t spell “Lloyd Carr” without two “L’s.” It’s time for Lloyd to retire. You can only say the same thing –in the same monotone voice with the same old St. Bernard’s face— so many times before someone calls your bluff, hands you a pink slip in the locker room, and sends you on your way.

The bottom line is, after two weeks of football, Michigan is in some serious trouble. For the first time in a long time, there isn’t room to spin a mediocre Wolverine’s season into a mere polished pile of dog poop; in a strange and rather counterintuitive way, it’s sort of refreshing. Maybe this is the wakeup call that Michigan needs. I guess we could still win the Big Ten, and oh how convenient would that be for Lloyd Carr’s bootlegged PR team!? I think it’d be more appropriate if we just continued to lose. We have Notre Dame this weekend and then it’s on to Penn State… How many campus riots can one joke of a team induce in just one season? I guess only time will tell. Until then, somewhat regretfully, Go Blue! — Zach Crantz