By Robert Conrad
With more than 15 years of working experience, I’ve experienced office gossip on some level, and have even lost a couple of jobs after falling victim to it.
As a result, I’ve been tainted by my own negative experiences with it.
However, is it possible that office gossip can be beneficial or even indicative of a company’s culture?
I’d like to think so.
Merriam-Webster defines “gossip” as “information about the behavior and personal lives of other people,” which is a fairly neutral description of what some may consider a four-letter word.
Supporters of office gossip state that doing so displays concern for others and their well-being.
It has even been shown in a 2012 study that office gossip reduces stress, prevents exploitation, and promotes more generous behavior.
So, can office gossip be good, or is it just plain bad?
Can Office Gossip Equal Caring?
Imagine a group of friends who regularly gather around the water cooler at work as a daily ritual.
All of a sudden, one of them isn’t there for an extended period of time and isn’t even at their desk anymore.
Concerned for the absent employee, the workers begin to chat about the fate of their co-worker amongst themselves.
A positive office gossip exchange would go something like this:
“Where’s Norm? I haven’t seen him in a week?”
“I haven’t heard anything on my end. Has he called you?”
“No. I hope everything’s alright.”
“I’ll give him a call after work and let you know.”
By definition, those discussing the absent employee would be considered “gossiping,” but can it be described as negative?
The shared concern for the well-being of a fellow co-worker can hardly be construed as negative office gossip, as it didn’t pull apart his character or defame him in any way.
In 2010, Forbes cited that positive office gossip has many benefits for employees, including building camaraderie and trust among teammates that are in the loop.
Normally silent employees who harbor the same concern for their co-worker may even feel validated to voice their concerns, thus furthering camaraderie and trust among team members.
So when does office gossip cross over into the realm of destruction?
Loose Lips Sink Ships
In stark contrast, negative office gossip would be the same scenario above, but with harsh, unflattering exchanges about the missing employee.
A negative conversation about the missing employee would go something like this:
“I heard he was arrested over the weekend.”
“It probably didn’t help that he came into work drunk all of the time.”
“He came into work drunk?”
“Yes, and he even hit on the receptionist once.”
“I bet his wife wasn’t too happy about that!”
This is where the big difference lies: Speculation about the worker’s well-being is considered positive, whereas calling him a “drunk” and otherwise steered the conversation into negative territory, where it escalated quickly.
As negative office gossip spreads in an office environment, it can have the opposite effect of positive office gossip, which includes:
- Loss of trust and morale.
- Lost productivity.
- Hurt feelings and reputations.
- Division or cliques of co-workers.
Where positive office gossip would build trust and camaraderie among team members, negative gossip’s slanderous nature only serves to divide.
Using Office Gossip to Gauge Culture
Tight collaboration among team members is actually coveted in some technology companies.
Firms such as Mozilla and Facebook use custom work areas that encourage collaboration and personalization as a testament to this trend.
Work cultures, such as these, place a strong emphasis on both personal and team efforts.
Strong teams display both trust, appreciation of diversity, open communication. and the big kicker: Giving each other the benefit of the doubt.
This includes showing respectable concern for an unexpected and extended team member’s absence, and respecting their privacy when requested.
If this doesn’t happen at your new office, it could be a sign that negative office gossip is running rampant.
To simplify, is human empathy and respect a part of the discussion?
Do you think office gossip can be beneficial? Let me know in the comments below.
Nice post, Robert. I think office gossip can be beneficial when/if it leads to a solution to the problem being discussed. However, it can have the problem of being toxic prior to that solution being found, though it really all depends on the situation.
I hate office gossip. It cost me my last job.
YvonneGates I’d be lying if I said that the same thing never happened to me. I was simply afraid of internal conflict at my last job, and didn’t stick up for myself when confronted by the office bully, who happened to have a lot of friends and singled me out.
In the end, I’m glad it happened because I hated that job! I do, however, like feeling valued by my co-workers, and I can see how an unxexplained, extended absence could get them curious. I’d just prefer they called! 🙂
Thanks for reading!
Andrew_J_Martin That’s the dreaded gray area that I mulled over after I lost a previous job. I so badly wanted to stick up for myself, but in the end, all it took was one loose tongue to turn the whole office against me, thus prompting our manager (who just recently got hired on from Starbucks) to let me go.
It’s a shame how blurred the line can become at times, but funny how we can all tell when a conversation goes into uncomfortable and prying territory.
Thanks for reading!
What a great topic and an interesting angle …. I have thought a lot about this after transitioning from my job of almost 20 years (with a cast of characters that stayed quite consistent all things considered) to a telecommuting situation. I think to a certain extent, people are going to talk — some of it will be constructive, some of it will be destructive, and some of it will be somewhere in between (and therefore neutral). What I DO know/believe is that leadership needs to define/support/create a culture of support. I don’t mean that in a pollyanna way but …. an adult-oriented, we-support-one-another-and-do-not-bring-each-other-down kind of way. A worker can hope …..
biggreenpen That’s a great mentality to have! If the environment doesn’t support negativity in all interactions, it doesn’t have the chance to grow, thus leaving the negative gossiper in an awkward position.
I worked in a kitchen previously where gossip was the norm, and it would really ramp up among the part-timers when a full-time position was teased. Kind of sad, really, as some of these people would get together on weekends.
My motto lately: why give them ammo? 🙂
There’s a difference between expressing concern and poisoning the well.
As biggreenpen notes, it’s key to inspire a culture of support. And “gossip” can enable that culture. It can also spread misinformation, perpetuate negativity, and all sorts of other gnarly things.
Steer clear of the gossips.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this since I read it yesterday. Gossip has a negative connotation so it’s always going to be perceived as bad. Your “good gossip” examples wouldn’t really be considered gossip, in the traditional sense of the word. And, let’s be real, if someone is missing from work, even if you have the facts and only relay them, you’re still gossiping because you’re talking about the person behind their backs. I don’t know…I’m on the fence.
YvonneGates Shut up! I cannot think of a single situation that I would let someone go because of office gossip.
RobrtConrad1865 I really don’t know what to say about someone losing their job due to a person who gossips. I just…wow.
danielschiller biggreenpen I’ve experienced both, but of course the negative experience sticks out in my head the most. If anything, I learned to stick up for myself when bullied.
It got to the point where I hated going to work every day, and that’s something I’ve always been dead set against. It’s good to have concerned friends, though! 🙂
RobertConrad1865 biggreenpen Gossip always carries that unsavory connotation. I’m fortunate to work in an environment where we don’t have — nor do we tolerate — office bullies. I’d make other plans if it were otherwise. I remain convinced, steer clear of the gossips.
ginidietrich -Okay, here’s the problem I have with gossip in general… Those *really* in the know, never share what they know! Insider knowledge is power, and why would you ever surrender or jeopardize that position? Steer clear of the gossips! Tomorrow it will be you.
ginidietrich I can see your point. I would probably be flattered if my co-workers were concerned about my prolonged, unannounced absence to be honest. However, I have picked up on some cues over time that let’s me know when I’m being discussed in a negative light, such as the room going silent when you walk in, snickers when you walk by.
The majority of folks that I know who have experienced negative gossip seem to develop almost a 6th sense when it comes to sniffing it out. Maybe we should invent a new term for “positive gossip” that isn’t “concern”? Maybe “Wozzup”? 🙂