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Gini Dietrich

What the Opt-Out Generation Means Longer-Term

By: Gini Dietrich | August 12, 2013 | 
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What the Opt-Out Generation Means Longer-TermBy Gini Dietrich

In yesterday’s The Three Things, Lindsay Bell-Wheeler linked to a New York Times article about the opt-out generation of women who quit their careers to raise their families and work inside the home.

It made both of our blood boil. Hers because of the women they portrayed (upper-class, country club, 9,000 square foot homes, highly-educated) who have (or had) husbands who made a good enough living for them to “opt out” of the workforce yet maintain their style of living…and are now complaining because they have to move into a 2,500 square foot townhome because of a divorce.

You can read what she wrote in the blog post and in the comments…and get her riled up more.

I agree with all of those things and more.

A Personal Story

I hope my mom won’t mind my telling this story.

When I was 17, my parents split up. I have three younger brothers and a younger sister (I also have a half-brother, but he didn’t fit into this equation). My dad worked two jobs nearly my entire life and he was never home. When he was home, he was the disciplinarian.

My mom, on the other hand, was with us 24/7. She cooked, she cleaned, she made our clothes, she scheduled our activities, she did the shopping, she made us do our homework…she raised us.

She never worked outside of the home. Not until she got divorced. But, by then, she’d been out of the workforce nearly 20 years and didn’t have desirable skills to an employer.

She’s highly educated, highly intelligent, and extremely talented. And the workforce required she start all over. Those 20 years meant nothing on a resume. To the workforce, she was a brand new college graduate, but with baggage.

As well, when faced with divorce and custody of five children (well, four and a half as I was off to college on a full-ride academic scholarship), she didn’t have her own credit as all of the bills – the utilities, the car, the mortgage – were in my dad’s name.

And the best job she could get? She worked herself up to manager of a retail store a few blocks from our home so we could hang out there after school.

She worked herself nearly to death and it wasn’t enough. She couldn’t make ends meet. She was starting from scratch with lots of mouths to feed. Eventually my dad got custody of my siblings and he moved them to Michigan.

It nearly killed my mom. Literally.

Long-Term Investment in Your Career

I’m reading Lean In (more on that when I finish it) and one of the things Sheryl Sandberg talks about is to think about the long-term effects of the opt-out generation. What happens when you leave your job to raise your family.

The examples she uses aren’t unlike what my mom and some of my friends are going through now: A divorce, a spouse dies, a spouse is injured and can no longer work.

Lots of women decide to leave the workforce because their salaries barely cover childcare when they are born.

It makes sense, right? If your salary goes to childcare, what’s the point in working and being away from your kids, particularly before they go to school?

But what we don’t think about is the salary increases and bonuses we receive during those years. So your salary may barely cover childcare right now, but three years from now, you’ll be making more money. Perhaps you also receive bonuses or incentives. More money added to that. Suddenly the long-term investment in your career doesn’t look so bad.

Of course, none of us think anything bad will happen to us. We’re not going to get divorced. Our spouse isn’t going to get sick. Our spouse isn’t going to be hurt so badly he or she can’t work. That stuff happens to other people.

Opt-Out Generation: Invest in You

I’m not advocating everyone make the same choices I would make. I’m certainly not advocating everyone run out and find themselves jobs.

But what I am advocating is doing things that invest in you in the long-term. Not in your kids. Not in your spouse. In you.

Put some of the bills in your name, particularly the ones that are hard to get without any credit – the utilities, the insurance – and make sure your mortgage has both of your names on it.

Keep your skills fresh by working part-time, even if it’s from home. Technology offers an amazing opportunity for many of us to raise our families and bring in a paycheck. As well, workplaces are becoming more flexible, giving both parents the opportunity to share responsibilities for sick kids or after school activities.

Find ways to keep your resume updated through volunteer activities that mean something to an employer.

This way, the opt-out generation has a way to opt back in. Maybe you’ll be lucky and never need it. Or maybe you’ll find yourself in need of something more when they kids go off to college. Or maybe something more drastic happens and you have no choice.

Whatever it happens to be, don’t lose the opportunity to invest in you.

About Gini Dietrich


Gini Dietrich is the founder and CEO of Arment Dietrich, an integrated marketing communications firm. She is the author of Spin Sucks, co-author of Marketing in the Round, and co-host of Inside PR. She also is the lead blogger at Spin Sucks and is the founder of Spin Sucks Pro.

135 comments
ltcassociates
ltcassociates

Hi @ginidietrich, it didn't appear that any prior commenters brought up this angle, so I'll address it (seeing as I'm the resident insurance guy around these parts).

In your article you raise this point, "A divorce, a spouse dies, a spouse is injured and can no longer work" as 3 reasons why Opt-Out Women need to be prepared to burnish their resumes and jump back into the workforce, sometimes at a big disadvantage.

While I can't offer a direct solution for divorce, let's not forget that Life Insurance and Disability Insurance (DI) are protection products designed to cushion life's unexpected curveballs such as these and given widows, widowers, or families of the disabled the cash cushion they need to get back on their feet. Protection products like these are magnified when you're not a 1%'er like Sheryl Sandberg.

Off my teeny soapbox... truth is, I don't even sell this kind of insurance. I just play an agent on TV.

MRTraska
MRTraska

Well, now that we know Sheryl Sandberg is a twit who won't pay her interns despite making millions, we certainly shouldn't be listening to her, either -- she's just another one-percenter who Doesn't Get It, i.e., she's completely divorced from the reality that the rest of the world experiences.  One of the NYTimes commenters nailed it when she wrote that feminism was never about having it all: it was about having choices.  The corollary to having choices is making trade-offs.  There IS no having it all, no more so for women than for men.

My mama was an architect who worked while I was growing up (her mother lived with us and was home when we got back from school, but that also had its trade-offs as grandma couldn't stand my dad, which, it turned out was for good cause; but that's another conversation).  My mother told me when I was 12 that I must always have my own money (AND not get pregnant before marriage, AND not marry until after I had a degree and a good job, thus earning my own money) because the guy can always die or leave, and leave you stuck with no money, a kid, and no support -- and your life then changes irrevocably and never for the better.  Not having your own money severely limits your future.  Consequently, Mama was less than brave about asking for long-overdue raises because she didn't want to risk losing her job at a time when very few women worked, let alone in architecture.  In retrospect, I wish she'd spoken up for herself more; she didn't because she needed a second income to raise her daughters.

I saw what all her trade-offs were and made my own choices later:  two degrees, no kids, and for most of my life, no husband (hey, Mr. Right never showed up, but the bills still had to be paid).  I only worked under duress for bosses who insulted or mistreated me, and then only until I could extricate myself to another job, and I had that freedom because I had my own money and no dependents.  As a result, half my career has been freelance, never my first choice, but I learned to live with it.  It's still not my first choice -- but at least I don't have to make anyone else suffer for my choices.

Moreover, I have a life and choices because my mama told me, long before I understood what that strange thing called high school was, that I would be going to university and getting a degree in a profession.  Which profession was my choice, but I was going to be educated and a working woman; she wasn't paying her hard-earned money for me to stay at home the rest of my life or work for minimum wage.  I'm glad she's not around now to see what my profession (journalism, ironically) has become or how many of us are out of work or freelancing without choice because the media is undergoing a sea change.  But then, that's life:  you pay your money, you take your chances, and you can't anticipate everything.

Trade-offs.  I don't suppose Sandberg is familiar with the concept.  Then again, those women in the NYTimes article don't seem to be, either.  That's the one percent for you -- and there will always be a one percent.  What surprises me is that anyone looks to them for examples of anything useful.


rdopping
rdopping

It's really too bad that these books and topics need to be. We all could be focussing on so many other things but alas we must simply because we as a society still have so much to learn.

Where are the men in all this with their egos, insecurities and macho bull? Not only do your suggestions make perfect sense but the guys who read this also need to see this from a hand perspective. SUPPORT your wife doesn't ALWAYS mean financially. We may be better off, if more guys would get off their butts and figure out that there are no guarantees in life then the selfishness may be replaced with a little compassion and god forbid, forethought and intelligence.

AmyMccTobin
AmyMccTobin

Can I just say "BRAVO" for reading the flippin book, Lean In.  The number of women finding fault with Sandberg never having read the book infuriates me beyond belief, but that's an entirely different blog post.  

You are right, right, right.  You can 'invest in yourself' WHILE raising kids.  @ShellyKramer  described herself today as something along the lines of "one of the crazy ones juggling it all and loving every minute."  I loved that description - my house isn't always clean, I'm not always the perfect mom NOR am I always the perfect professional, but I try my ass off to be the best at both.  Additionally, I have lots of clients, women who own their own businesses and work from home WHILE they raise their kids.   When their kids leave the nest, unlike your mom, they have a continuous resume to showcase IF they want to go and work for someone else.  There is no need to totally opt out of your own needs and growth career wise.

PS: Tell your mom she rocks.  She had to, because we all got you out of it.

LauraPetrolino
LauraPetrolino

I've tried to write like 800 blogs on women and how I think they road block themselves and their success and most of all their individual happiness, but each time I do it just ends up me ranting away and making no sense. So I love when other people write articles on this issue and I can go over and 'not comment' long monologues on their blogs. Tag you are it! Two times in one week too with Lindsay's yesterday. This is great therapy for my angst on this topic. 

Women are their own worst enemy for so many reasons, the two main ones:

a) trying to fit some mold they think is the right way to be

b) hating and belittling each other, pulling each other down, belittling their choices and for some reason believing that just because your choice is right for you it is the only 'holy' thing to do. 

Let's start with (b). When women make a life decision they treat it like a holy grail and anyone else that makes a different one is 'de debil' (I'm honestly not sure why I can't write without using the inflections or made up accents I talk with,  like really 'de debil, necessary for my point? No, but OMG sometimes I can't even deal with my own crazy...anyway moving on)

Having children is one of those issues and another one I really should 'not comment' on, but seriously the vile hatred that women spew my direction when I tell them I'm not interested in having kids is as if I was telling them that I was sent from deep space nine to sleep with their husbands, steal their children and poison their grandmas. I mean dear god, just STOP, STOP, STOP. Stop wasting your energy trying to give yourself and your choices some type of justification by vilifying mine.

BUT, do you know why they do that (see I'm getting to my point, it all is circling back now....8 decades later, oh look at that, Laura found her point). They do this precisely because of the point you make in this post (and (a)), they have lost (or never had their own identity). No idea what their priorities are, no idea what they want, no idea what their passion is (personally or professionally). 

Too many women have spent their lives trying to fit a mold. The mom mode, the professional mode, the 'I can do business like a man mode' (which by the way, hey guess what, you aren't a man, don't try to compete with men in that way because...crazy, but men will always be better than you at being MEN!!!! So do business like a woman, because that is what you are and that gives you your own unique power...this is not brain surgery here), the 'does it all mode'. And they do this instead of spending that time figuring out their own unique mode.

And that my friends.....is the rest of the story.

lmspreen
lmspreen

To leave a career and let yourself become less valuable, work-wise, is to court disaster. I hate to sound like we can't trust anybody, but even if a loving partner fully intends to support us and the children we raise, life can intervene in the form of layoff, illness or death. I would never for a minute trust another human being to support me. Your advice is perfect. Stay in the game somehow. Your financial life may depend on it.

ryancox
ryancox

I just read this @ginidietrich and while I hate always agreeing with you (makes for less #ohsnaps kind of comments, I agree 100 percent. I have been living a modified-version of this for the past six years. I did not "plan" on having kids yet, but when I decided to step up and become a guardian of two of my nephews, I immediately had to juggle it. Luckily, my mom was the other guardian, so I wasn't trying to do it solo. 

I was faced with a decision though -- invest in myself, or use what little free-time I had to do the normal mid-twenties stuff. I decided to invest in myself and spent the majority of that free-time building relationships, learning, practicing, etc.

So like I said, I was a modified-version of the examples you gave, it was still semi-related. I'm glad I chose what I chose.

In the grand scheme of things, I agree with you 1000 percent. I have too many female friends now (who are we kidding, it's 99 percent of the cases) who are complete care givers, but are struggling to find a job, find relevance in a job, or are simply choosing not to work at all.

Divorce is a much more common thing now then X years ago (sad to say, but fact) and I worry that many of them are putting themselves behind the proverbial eight ball.

Rvirginia
Rvirginia

As a new mother, I'm currently grappling with this. My corporate job was not flexible with tele- or part-time work and it's important to my husband and me that our child is raised right. So instead of searching for another job (and a daycare!) now that I have a newborn, I'm going to raise our baby. I had a great career and have made great money but I've seen companies have no loyalty to their employees so I don't feel like I'm missing much that I can't return to. As for doing something for myself, my husband is urging me to do freelance work; I may consider going back to school via an online program. I think until companies start making it more accessible for mothers (or fathers!), they're going to continue seeing fall out from experienced, very qualified people like me, unfortunately. So now I'm learning a new skill set - while not valued in professional terms is invaluable personally - and hoping by the time I return to the workforce that things will be viewed a little differently than they were for your mom. Thanks for sharing her story - so sad that she went through that - and thank you for the encouragement to stay on a track even while I'm taking a deliberate leave.

sherrilynne
sherrilynne

Everything you say in this post makes perfect sense.  I agree with it all.  But I do despair that we are still having these conversations in 2013.  Back in the 70s they told us things were going to be different for women from now on...how wrong they were. I do hope things will be different for my Granddaughter.

TaraGeissinger
TaraGeissinger

So many amazing comments that I agree with, so I'll just put it out there that I work for many reasons -- one of which is to be a role model for my daughter. These are the life lessons that they simply don't teach in school. It's great to be a SAHM for a while, but be sure that you're getting what YOU need in the long term. I think how @Word Ninja set it up is ideal. Be home and present for your children when they need you, but keep in touch with your industry and your passion however you can. That might mean freelancing, attending industry conferences or even volunteering to keep your resume and skills sharp. When the time comes, however, you'll be glad you did. 

It's never fun to plan for bad things to happen. I hear from friends and family all the time about how insurance isn't worth it. But my husband is a financial planner so we have more insurance than probably anybody I know! (Including policies on each kid.) Because you know what? Hopefully we don't ever have to use them, but if we do.....we'll sure as heck be glad it's there!

ifdyperez
ifdyperez

PREACH IT, GIRL! This is about women making smart choices, especially investing in a "plan B" that can get you back up on your feet. And sadly, not many women think this way, and I don't know why. Nothing in this life is guaranteed, and credit runs out quickly. Gosh, and I know women who are in this situation now. It makes me anxious for them.

lmspreen
lmspreen

@MRTraska Your mom sounds like a hero, and you've made your own way. However, I don't think SS can objectively be called a "twit" and I don't think you can know whether she's make tradeoffs. It doesn't further the discussion. 

ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@AmyMccTobin I really loved the book. I have less than a chapter left to read and I think it's one of the most important books of our generation. When I read the criticism now, it's pretty clear they haven't read the book. Most take the concept of "leaning in" and vilify Sandberg. It's totally ridiculous. That idea makes up maybe half of a chapter of the entire book.

Don't worry. I have a blog post coming soon that is going to piss off a bunch of people because I read the book and I agree with 99 percent of it.

I will tell my mom. I made her cry yesterday. :|

P.S. Looks like A had a ton of fun with Hessie's family this past weekend.

MRTraska
MRTraska

@LauraPetrolino I agree on all points.  I'd also like to point out that not fitting into a mold also has its price.  I wouldn't want to be anything other than what and who I am; I know who I am and what I'm worth, and I'm happy with that.  I tend to come at issues differently than most men but also differently than a lot of women.  I'm also not a girly-girl, but I like being a woman.  It shows, and I have no problem with that.

Other people sometimes do have a problem with that, however.  Envy, resentment because they don't have as much nerve, you name it.  You'd be surprised how much individualism and intelligence in women bothers people, even today.  A woman not fitting expectations or a stereotype also intimidates a lot of people, mostly men but also some women.  Men are just less likely to say so openly these days.  Once upon a time, it infuriated complete strangers that I never changed my name when I married (I told them it was none of their business; you can imagine how many friends that got me; but at least I got to say the same thing to my ex's grandmother, too, when she asked when I was having kids and I informed her I wasn't).  Imagine my surprise when I read in Women's Health just the other day that a majority of men polled by Men's Health magazine (better than 60 percent) would resent it if their brides didn't take their husbands' surnames and an even bigger majority (in the 90 percent range) wouldn't consider taking their wives' surnames.  They felt unmanned by the suggestion and said a woman keeping her own name showed that she really didn't love him.  Really?!?  Narcissistic much???  Those boys need to be slapped silly -- and I say boys, because real men wouldn't think that way.

You know what I tell people when they give me some version of that old Japanese maxim 'the nail that sticks out gets the hammer'?  Answer:  you're mistaken -- I'm not the nail, I'm the steamroller that's gonna break that hammer;  then maybe the hammer will finally shut up and mind its own business.  Yeah, it's still intimidating, but it's sure effective in getting people to stop.  ;D


ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@LauraPetrolino At this "(I'm honestly not sure why I can't write without using the inflections or made up accents I talk with,  like really 'de debil, necessary for my point? No, but OMG sometimes I can't even deal with my own crazy...anyway moving on)" I spit wine at my computer! YOU OWE ME!

I have a really good friend from high school. He is the only person I still have a really good relationship with from high school (in fact, you probably know who he is). When he and his wife separated earlier this year, *I* was the reason she kept bringing up as part of their problems. It was shocking to me. We've been friends for nearly 20 years. We've never slept together. We never dated. We're really good friends. To say I'm the cause of all your problems is ludicrous.

But that's what women do. We vilify one another and it makes me really, really sad.

Karen_C_Wilson
Karen_C_Wilson

@LauraPetrolino So well said. I have had several women (and one or two men) tell me that they are too selfish to have children - with the *expectation* that I (who wanted and now have a child) would berate them for their stance. I had this conversation with someone earlier today in fact. I really don't think not wanting kids is selfish. I don't think wanting kids is selfish. I have an only child and he probably will remain an only child and I definitely feel some parents of multiple children look down on me for that, but I don't care. We're all different people and we're all going to want different things. I have my views on why that is, but it gets into one of those topics I don't discuss online, so I'll stop there.

I've been working at looking at my motivations when I criticize other business owners lately (only in my brain, usually) - especially women. Because if I'm just in a catty, competitive mood then I need to get over it. There's enough business for me out there and I can let them do their thing and I can do mine and we will both do just fine.

ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@Rvirginia Congratulations on being a new mom! That's exciting! I believe strongly in paying it forward. So, if I can help in any way should you decide to freelance or need help with class projects or anything, please let me know!

Word Ninja
Word Ninja

@Rvirginia Freelancing worked well for me while I was home with 1 then 2 then 3 kids, although I did it on a small scale among other pursuits. We lived below our means, and the money I made was used for special trips or things around the house. And man did those years raising kids fly by... But, yes, I also recommend that you freelance or go to school. You and your dreams and goals are important. 

photo chris
photo chris

@Rvirginia Congratulations! Both on the baby and on your decision- it's a tough one for any family. As a "mommy" who stayed in the workforce (but who DOES have a more flexible schedule) I can tell you it IS hard. But, I can also tell you that there are amazing caregivers out there who you may one day find, when you are ready,  will add a level of love, service and commitment to your family that you may not have thought possible. My daughter was in a kindercare part time that was literally next door to my workplace so when I DID return, I could "lunch" with her (well, her on me anyway in the early days, ha!)  I often say if it weren't for them, she wouldn't be potty trained. At six- I can pick her up and drop her off anywhere (school, sports, parties) and I know that she will make friends and be involved. When my son was born it was a bit cheaper to have someone come to the house and I have been blessed in three years to have two amazing, flexible, wonderful,.loving caregivers who my children adore!  

ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@sherrilynne If you haven't read Lean In yet, you should. She says this exact thing. She thought her generation wouldn't have to fight for equality because there was so much done on it in the 60s and 70s. Turns out, it's just not the case. And that sucks.

ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@TaraGeissinger It's like having a crisis plan for your business. It's insurance. Hopefully you'll never need it, but if you do...boy, it sure is good to have it. I was thinking about how much I want to do Ride the Rockies next year and, if we have kids by then, how cool it would be for them to see their mom finish a ride like that. It IS all about being a role model and I think that is very, very cool of you to think about it that way.

Word Ninja
Word Ninja

@TaraGeissinger It worked for me, but it wouldn't for everyone. Like everything, I believe it's about balance. And I couldn't stand the thought of someone else raising my children, at least while they were small. If anyone was going to screw them up, it was going to be me, dammit.

MRTraska
MRTraska

@ifdyperez   Smart choices are the ones that are right for you now but won't come back to bite you in the *** later ... and it's not always possible to know that, although some things are more likely than others to bite you later.  What IS certain is that it's always better to have not just plan B but also plan C **AND** your own money, preferably a decent nest egg, before you take a big risk.  And if you don't have that, either don't take the risk or be prepared for subsequent unpleasantness.  Informed choices and trade-offs, right?

ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@ifdyperez It makes me anxious, too. My SIL just bought a house with her baby daddy (who we really like so it's not as derogatory as that sounds) and I FREAKED out when she said she wasn't on the mortgage. I made her change that immediately. No one is losing out on that on my watch!

ginidietrich
ginidietrich moderator

@lmspreen @MRTraska Have you been able to find anything that proves Sandberg knows about the unpaid interns? Everything I've seen says it was for the Lean In initiative, but she wasn't aware. I'd be interested to know if that's not the case.

I read Lean In. I thought it was an excellent book. Not because of who she is or what opportunities she's had many of us did not have, but because it furthers the discussion we need to have as a generation.

A few things I loved about it:

* Women make up more than half the world's population, yet we're too busy fighting against one another versus working together. Can you imagine the power we'd have if we worked together?

* It's not about leaning in all the time. It's about knowing when to lean out, as well. But not to lean out when your fairy tale life is still in your head and not actually happening yet.

* In 1975, women spent 11 hours each week on direct childcare (feeding, bathing, reading, etc.). Today moms spend 11 hours each week on direct child care yet we feel guilty it's not more because somehow between when I was born and my friends starting having kids (I'm not there yet), society told us we have to be helicopter parents. As a business owner, I can tell you how bad it is when children who have helicopter parents come to work. I once had a father of a young man call me to negotiate his salary. I rescinded the offer.

I got a good nugget or two from every chapter and it was more about this than about what kind of life Sandberg has led.

AmyMccTobin
AmyMccTobin

@ginidietrich @AmyMccTobin  Here's the line that really hit a nerve with me, and I'm paraphrasing "the choice you make in a husband/partner is the most important career decision you make."  I WISH someone told me that when I was 20.

And I can't WAIT for your post.  At first I was slightly annoyed when some of my female marketing pals wrote anti-Sandberg posts and confessed to not reading the book, not I am fuming at what appears to be a backlash BY WOMEN against her who have no idea what Lean In is really about.  It's not about being aggressive and bitchy, it's about taking charge of your life.  You go!

LauraPetrolino
LauraPetrolino

@ginidietrich @LauraPetrolino Ugh, ugh! I hate that :( But also know that same story oh too well...I tend to have alot of guy friends (because they are less drama, and I have more similar interests with them) and I can't tell you how many times I've heard the "we can't be friends anymore because my wife/girlfriend says I'm not allowed to see you'. 

...and it makes me sad too. If only we supported each other, in our choices, in our priorities and helped each other reach where we wanted to be, but instead we rant oh so poetically and hypocritically about inequality. Guess what ladies, stop being your own trojan horse! 

LauraPetrolino
LauraPetrolino

@Karen_C_Wilson Karen, I'd like to give this comment a BIG GOLD STAR! Yes, agree with you on all counts! I have more to say on this issue, I'll circle back later today!

Rvirginia
Rvirginia

Thank you for your offer - I really appreciate that. And I'm so glad I found your blog. Really great pieces on here.

TaraGeissinger
TaraGeissinger

@ginidietrich @TaraGeissinger That's exactly what it's like! The whole "put your own oxygen mask on first" so that you can help others mentality. I think women in general lose themselves in Mommy Land and forget that if they aren't taking care of themselves -- and truly feeding their soul -- that it could end very, very badly. It's not all fairy tales.

TaraGeissinger
TaraGeissinger

@AmyMccTobin @ginidietrich Ohhh! That is a powerful thought -- and I totally agree with it. Thankfully my husband is the best friend and partner I could ever imagine, but I never really thought about it in terms of being a career move. My brain is spinning. I think I have to read the book.

MRTraska
MRTraska

@LauraPetrolino @ginidietrich  I have male friends (some for more than 35 years) and I have female friends, and I don't get drama from any of them.  Then again, maybe I'm more careful about whom I call friends.  I sure don't mean all those folks I know through Facebook and LinkedIn.  Those are contacts or colleagues, not friends.  I don't confuse the two.

RebeccaTodd
RebeccaTodd

@ginidietrich @LauraPetrolino @belllindsay @yvettepistorio Hah where do I start??? "De Debil" was amazeballs. I adore you Laura, maybe you should move up here and be my wife...

Yes now that I am openly saying I'm not having kids, people get weird. As I said below, "Why are you single?" is now the most annoying question I receive far too often. Like it would not be a choice anyone would ever make, or there is something wrong with me (Someone did ask "does your vagina have teeth?" but that was quite funny).  Then, what is worse, they feel they have to defend their choices to me. Thing is, I ain't judging, so when they do that, I sure as heck know they are. Sad. 


LauraPetrolino
LauraPetrolino

@ginidietrich oh and apologies on the computer :-) It was all actually part of my catty female plan to limit your success!! Muahhahahaha! I've also simultaneously submitted an expose story to HuffPo reporting on how the only reason AD is thriving is because you pimp both @belllindsay and @yvettepistorio out as female escorts to all new clients. I mean obviously, that is the only reason a woman leader would be successful right? 

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